How I Remain Passionate

Published on Feb 18, 2015

Join us as we talk to Jason Martozke, CHS Counselor, about supporting LGBTQ youth and his upcoming ND Counselors Association conference. We also talk with Rep. Joshua Boschee about SB2279 (which passed the Senate!) and why it's important to LGBTQ North Dakotans and their families, friends, and allies. Then we close the show with our series called Strength Through Stories. This episode features Kevin R. Tengesdal of Bismarck with "How I Remain Passionate."

The OUTLoud Podcast - Season 1, Episode 1

From the podcast, here is the text for the remarks that I shared:
 “How I Remain Passionate” by Kevin R. Tengesdal

How do I remain passionate with faith living in conservative North Dakota being a gay Christian? It certainly didn’t happen overnight. I have ridden this sod around the sun for many years; and naturally, my faith and views have ever so slowly evolved. Thankfully, they continue to grow and evolve. In a setting where the gay community seemingly would want me to believe there is no caring God, and the faith community is seemingly silent, why give a care? I say, “Why not?”

First off, I purpose to show up when I am able. Yes, I do have social anxieties that would rather keep me hidden, but I make the attempt to be there. Yes, life IS busy for everyone. How will people know there is a gay community when there aren’t more than just a few visible LGBTQ individuals?

Secondly, I use the power of social media to keep on promoting positive and affirming stories, either of allies taking a stand, gay people advancing causes, or faith communities reaching out. It’s been said jokingly that if you don’t see me posting for a few days, someone best come looking for my corpse.

Thirdly, I defend my faith in God. I have sadly witnessed gay folk turn away from a loving God full of mysterious grace and mercy all because of spiritual/Bible abuse against them. I want to reassure LGBTQ friends and straight allies that God does not have anything against us for being who He made us to be. Listen to the quiet whisper of His presence; amidst the clamoring noise, He is there with us.

Yes, certainly, it can be a tough journey, but I don’t remember anywhere that I was promised a tiptoe-through-the-tulips life. Peter Marshall stated, “If you don’t take a stand for something, you will fall for anything.” Micah 6:8 in the Bible simply states "He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the LORD require of you but to do justice, to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?”

For me, I choose to take a stand for just and right causes, promoting the fact of God’s grace, believing in the good of straight allies, and continuing to hope for a day in North Dakota where we will be treated with fair treatment, and not fear treatment. For me, I choose to find a circle, a pack, a chosen family to encourage one another along this trail. It’s all about community.

community

the addled boy upon the corner

looked to the right

looked to the left

looked to the skies

wondered freely, “what am i seeking?”

community

the cautious dude inside his evolution

discovered his sexual parts

discovered his sexual identity

discovered his sexual orientation

wondered robustly, “what am i wanting?”

community

the escaping fellow among the global

traveled toward new education

traveled toward new horizons

traveled toward new shores

wondered inquisitively, “what am i pursuing?”

community

the growing human within his grounding

embraced the spiritual messiah

embraced the spiritual path

embraced the spiritual hope

wondered earnestly, “what am i following?”

community

the fraught entity between his developing

wrestled with the identities

wrestled with the remedies

wrestled with the knowledge

wondered never-ending, “what am i undertaking?”

community

the discharged chap from the burden

accepted the grace of his father above

accepted the grace of his identities within

accepted the grace of his future forward

wondered deeply, “what am i promoting?”

community

the adept boy outside the closet

continues to look to

continues to discover

continues to travel toward

continues to embrace

continues to wrestle with

continues to accept

community

seeks commonality freely

wants affiliation robustly

pursues comradeship inquisitively

follows alliance earnestly

undertakes centralizing never-ending

promotes association deeply

community